Last year my word of the year was ‘Home‘.
It was a good choice and one that stayed with me in so many ways over the year. I spent a lot of time in our home, trying to make it work for us as a family. I think that I made it somewhere nice to be. I still have plenty more work to do but I feel happier here than I did at the start of last year and that is a good thing. There will definitely be more of the same in the next few months, something we need as a family after 2012 is some stability and routine and I am going to make our home the hub of our family life. In the past year I gave up my job and started trying to make money from home, through this blog and my love of sewing and making which grew daily into something quite special. Our home is no longer somewhere I leave in the morning and come back to at night, it is the centre of my days. I really hope that I can manage to keep it that way in 2013.
However, last year was really all about getting through it. Getting through the week when Mr C was away. Getting through the next set of challenges. Getting through the night with little sleep. Getting through the day in a sleep deprived haze. Things really aren’t much better in that area but I am hoping that the stability and routine that I crave at the moment, during these winter months, will calm each of us and make us more rested.
And then it is time to turn my thoughts and energies onto something very important indeed.
My word for 2013 is ME.
I am not sure exactly how this will pan out. I am not sure exactly what I would like to achieve. I do know that the right amount of medication finally sees me on much more of a level footing and ready to spend time thinking about myself. Not just as a mum but who I am as a person these days, after so much has changed in my life in such a relatively short time. I have attended CBT workshops for my PND and anxiety but what I need now is time. Time to consider what I learnt, time to consider what I need to do to improve my mood and my feelings. I am good at carving out time for myself in my week but I need to start not just doing things that fill my Pebble Jar and give me the strength to face each day, I need to start working out why I feel the way I do, and implementing positive changes in my life so that I can start living not just getting through it.
I know that this is a huge thing, but I am prepared with ideas and plans and goals. I just need to get them in some sort of order. I have some short term goals already. I have this post from Kat to read and use to make useful goals that I can achieve. I have a ‘Greatness Journal’ recommended by another Kat that helps me focus on all the different areas in my life and to discover what I want in each area. I am ready to spend time thinking about ME and my place in the world and what my heart really wants.
This is the year that I spend time trying to decide what comes next, do I want to sew for a living, do I want a job again, would I rather just be home making sure everything is organised (ha ha)? Time developing skills and coping strategies for the way that I feel at times. Time to put myself first, and ask for help when I need it. Time for my health to become a priority for our family. I am sure the knock on benefits for all of us will be impressive. It is time to be a bit selfish.
If you were to choose one word for 2013 what would it be?