Well here we are. Twelve weeks.
There were times that I thought we might never make it to this point with our sanity intact. I can remember talking to Mr C and just saying that if we could make it to twelve weeks we would be fine. Dividing up the time into chunks helped me, we were a quarter of the way, a third, then half. Somewhere along the road I stopped doing that. I was surprised yesterday, thinking about this milestone that it was here already. That is not to say it became easier, although I suppose it has a little, it is more that I never thought this day would come.
We are finding our feet, my little girl and I. She is so very different from Piran, which of course is to be expected. We have fallen into a routine of sorts. The details will most probably bore you but I want to get them down here just to remember them. I don’t remember Piran’s and it frustrates me.
It varies slightly from day to day, depending on what the night was like, if she naps and what we have been doing so this is the last 24 hours:
6.30 Bottle of milk
7.30 Short nap
9.30 Bottle of milk
12.00 Bottle of milk
1.30 Big sleep until next feed
3.00 Bottle of milk
5.45 Bath (every few nights), get ready for bed.
6.00 Bottle of milk and bed
10.00 Dream feed
4.00 Bottle of milk
Between sleeps and bottles of milk there is still a lot of crying. A lot. Kate wants to sit on my lap all the time. Our attempts with a sling have not been great, although I was hoping she would like it more when she could control her head so I should try again. Piran used to lie on the floor and look at toys and wriggle about for hours. I can get Kate to do it for ten minutes if I am lucky. She might consent to staying in her cot for 20 minutes in the morning watching her mobile if she is feeling generous.
She just likes to be moving. A swing has been a godsend, even though sometimes she hates it occasionally she will fall asleep in it in the afternoon and stay that way for two hours. It is never guaranteed though. She is good if we are out and about as long as the pushchair or car just keeps moving. That is why I think there is so much more crying at home, less movement.
Having two children is tough and the fact of the matter is that the second child is left to cry a lot more than the first ever was. At times it is quicker and easier to deal with Piran’s demands before Kate’s and that will always result in more tears. That said, she does cry for at least 2 hours every day just because she wants to! Sometimes we have to just put her in her chair and rock her and let her get it out of her system.
She still wants to be fed lying down, the flatter the better. I still have no idea why.
Piran is showing signs of jealousy, where up until now he has been fine. He wants to sleep in our room every night, and always asks for a cuddle the moment I pick Kate up. I feel bad, because I am not coping so well the one thing that people can do to help is look after Piran, plus he goes to nursery and spends regular days with my inlaws so I feel that he is never with me, that I am always trying to get rid of him. I know that he loves to do all these things and that he has fun but I miss him. The answer is quality one on one time at the weekends when Mr C is around so I am working on that.
And so the weeks go past. A few more and we will be off to Cornwall to introduce Kate to my brothers and sisters for the first time, and all of her cousins. I cannot wait, I am so homesick. It will be nice to be home.
For now we have appointments and injections and birthdays and then we start swimming lessons next week. My girl and I are still finding our way, but we will muddle on regardless.