Being kind to myself

July 22, 2011

When I have a long list of things that I need to or would like to do I get into this state where I cannot do anything. I freeze under the pressure. I tried to tackle this in the past with my “Do ONE thing, properly” mentality and back when I had one baby to look after that worked for me.

But now my list is longer and free time is drastically reduced. So I am slipping back into old patterns. The feeling of constant panic in my stomach, that there are so many things that need to get done and no time to do them and if I don’t do them the world will end and I will be a bad mum and a bad wife… goes on and on.

Some lovely people have left some very supportive comments over the past week and their words of advice and support here and on Twitter have been a real comfort. One thing people keep saying to me is that I should be kind to myself. So I need to take their advice.

Accept all offers of help.
Don’t feel guilty or worry that they may suffer because of it. These people are grown ups and if they offer help that is their decision.
Aim low; getting all three of us up and dressed each day is an achievement in itself.
Spend less time on Twitter and read a book.
Get one night of uninterrupted sleep a week. Mr C can cope with one night.
I have ordered Piran’s birthday cake from Waitrose instead of making it myself.
Simple is good for our birthday party. Jugs of Pimms and a few balloons thrown about will be enough.
I am unsubscribing from all the junk emails that litter my inbox.
I am saying no to offers and opportunities unless it is something I cannot bear to miss.
I am trying to eat well. Less junk food for sure but I’m still eating too much toast.
I am being honest about how I feel, and letting myself cry if I need to.
I am not making the bed. No one cares.
I am looking for shortcuts in everything I do.
I am making lots of plans with lots of people because the days that are full and busy are easier than the ones at home.
I am trying to snatch child free moments and I am being selfish. Sewing and reading and blogging.
I have a big list of all the things I need to do. Once it is on the list it is out of my brain.

I think that is it. Any good hints, tips and advice gratefully received.

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