Is there a help group or something?

August 4, 2005

I’m serious – is it possible to be addicted to Blogging? It’s not just the posting for me – it’s the reading of other people’s too. There are some crazy people out there. I really think I might need to get out more.

Not that I am staying in all that much. I went for a walk with Matt after work today which was lovely – a hour and a half up and down Hove seafront. It was windy but nice to get out and feel like I am not withering and dying inside every school night! Got back to the flat and Girlie number 1 has gone out with the man in her life for a belated birthday meal and Girlie number 2 finished her dinner and then went with her bestest buddy to the pub across the road for a cheeky pint (I would like to point out that this was two and a half hours ago – quick pint my arse!). So I have actually had the flat to myself in like the first time ever which is just amazing. Love sharing but sometimes I just want to be alone to potter and watch what I want on tv and blog and listen to music at the same time.

Have discovered a new fantastic singer/songwriter Tristan Prettyman. Really loving what I have heard so far – I am going to have to go and get her album, Twenty Three.

Girlie number 2 is back from the pub but not pissed – full of tales of the open mic night across the road. Sounds like there was some great stuff on.

I am tired but at the point where I really do not want to go to bed because that will mean that tomorrow will be here and it will be work, work, work again! Thank Crunchie tomorrow is Friday! Loads to do at work – but expect that our Friday trip to the pub at lunchtime will result in me blogging the afternoon away.

Just one more thing before I give in to the attractive thought of cuddling in bed with Dave the penguin. Couple of nights ago I mentioned sending a text to an ex whilst slightly tipsy – well the cheeky bastard didn’t reply. Come on is it that hard just to say hi? It’s not like he is a recent ex – more an old fuck buddy that I kept in touch with but it hurts dammit. God, what am I like? If I had a man I wouldn’t even bother getting in touch with him! There’s just always been something between us. Like I said a distant flirt.

I could actually be insane – only broke up with Jon like 5 days ago. I know what it is, I need reassurance that I am still attractive and that someone wants me even if it is just for sex. Agggghhhhhhhhh. Why, why, why? Why can I not cope with just being me on my own and trusting my own judgement about myself? Why do I need constant approval from people? Answers on a postcard please to Neurotic single girl, sofa, somewhere near Brighton, UK.

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