You are now two and a half. I am cross that I missed the passing of your half birthday without a little celebration – there should always be cake at least. Mind you, I know that you do okay for cake when you are with your Grandparents so I won’t worry too much.
Things are very different round here now. Piran goes off to school every weekday and you either spend the day with Nanny and Grandad, or go to nursery or spend the day with me. I try not to get offended that when you ask what you are doing each day I am always last on your list. It is a lot of fun just you and me though and now I can leave the buggy in the car and off you go. I ask you if you want to walk or go in the buggy and you always say “No Mummy RUN”. And off you go. Toddlers have a reputation for being slow, dawdling and taking their time to look at everything. Not you. Everywhere and everything is approached at a dead run. I realised this week you don’t really wobble when you run anymore.
All of a sudden you look much bigger to your dad and me. There is no baby softness left to you, you are long and thin and very bony. You don’t look it but you love to climb on anyone or anything and as you traverse my body you use your very pointy elbows and diggy knees to get up and over me. Ow ow ow. I ask you to stop but you just laugh. You do that a lot.
You are very two and a half too, with your mischief and silliness and pushing of every single boundary possible. I do wish though that you were not so cute sometimes, your sulky just got told off face is adorable and makes me laugh every time. Which is not on when I am meant to be being firm with you. You seem to really be thinking about yourself and how you feel at the moment. All of a sudden my days are filled with I am hungry, I am cold, I am tired, I am hungry, I am a bit grumpy, I am a bit tired and a lot grumpy, I am hungry. You are always hungry until about 4pm when your appetite just disappears. You so rarely each your dinner in the evening. I would worry but you have 3 or 4 breakfasts each day so I just think that is the way you are made.
We had a lovely holiday in Cornwall at Grandma’s house and then camping in Granddad’s garden for a week. You have never been able to spend that much time with my dad before and you seemed to fall head over heels for him. Grandad John was a definite hit. You sat for ages on his knee as he drew you pictures while he painted. It made me so happy to see that.
You are very very gorgeous and a little bit crazy. You are so different to your brother who is shy and quiet, it is quite a shock. But I have noticed over the past couple of months that you are so much more when he is around you. It is like he is your comforter, he makes you feel big and strong and safe. So even though you are the one leading the way most of the time he is the one making you so strong and brave. It really took a lot of getting used to when we started going places just the two of us and you hung off me and was so shy. I wondered what had happened to the Kate I knew. You are in there though, just takes you a little longer to get started without your brother.
You are always singing, you sleep better at night now it is darker at bedtime and in the morning. You love nursery. You won’t let me brush your hair but you will let Kirsty your key worker or Nanny. You don’t sleep during the day unless you are in the car, on the bus, in a buggy or at nursery. You can get VERY ANNOYED by the end of the day if you miss your sleep. If I ask for a kiss you give me a cuddle. Then I might get a kiss afterward. You never stand still, you are always jumping, or moving, or wiggling, or climbing or wandering off.
Trying to capture you in words is really quite hard. You are a force of nature that pushes every button I have. But somehow that just makes my love for you more passionate. I always thought there was one type of love but I definitely love you and your brother in very different ways. Not one more than the other but how my love for you makes me feel. Something tells me our relationship might not always be plain sailing but there is a part of me buried deep inside that is connected to you in a way that could never ever break. It is a scary and wonderful thing.
All my love,